CLICK ON THE LINK....

HERE'S AN EXAMPLE: SWEET HOME ALABAMA

WHO PLAYS THIS ON THE JUKE BOX: Look to the bar, there’s probably a gentleman there who’s wearing a flannel shirt with black sleeves. Upon closer inspection, you’ll realize he’s wearing a sleeveless flannel shirt, and what you thought were sleeves are actually a dark, dense fur that’s made a home on in his shoulders and upper arms. He’ll meander up to the juke box and stare it for ten minutes looking through every album twice, because unlike the sex he has with his obese wife, he’s in no rush to finish. When he selects the song, watch closely, because as it begins to play, he’ll say the words “turn it up,” then hold his hand up and when Skynyrd says “turn it up,” he’ll drop his hand down, signifying that he correctly predicted Skynyrd would say this as well.

WHY IT NEEDS TO RETIRE: If Lynyrd Skynyrd had a Juke Box at their house, I’m pretty sure this wouldn’t be on it. This song, much like Jenna Jameson’s vagina, once was great, but years of non-stop commercialized rocking have made it unsuitable for use.

Comic pioneer George Carlin dies at 71

BY DAVID HINCKLEY
DAILY NEWS TV CRITIC

Updated Monday, June 23rd 2008, 2:30 AM

Corkery/News

Click image for a closer look at George Carlin's career.

George Carlin, an extraordinary standup comedian whose dark social satire won him multigenerational popularity and a starring role in the most famous broadcast obscenity case of modern times, died Sunday of heart failure in Los Angeles. He was 71.

The Manhattan-born comedian, who always said his often-cynical satire simply reflected his real-life disdain for mankind's greed, stupidity and inconsideration, had a history of heart problems. He also did a stint in rehab in 2003 for drug dependency.

The TV network Comedy Central in 2004 named him the second best standup comedian of all time, behind Richard Pryor.

Late last week the Kennedy Center announced he would receive its annual Mark Twain prize for American humor this November.

Carlin became one of the most popular standup comedians in America in the 1960s and early 1970s through programs like "The Ed Sullivan Show."

He seemed ambivalent about that success, though, and gradually shifted much of his act to a counterculture posture reminiscent of the late Lenny Bruce. Carlin admired Bruce and was in the building when Bruce was arrested for obscenity.

Carlin was one of the first comedians to dress "naturally" for a standup routine, in jeans and a beard, and his most famous routine became "Seven Words You Can Never Say On Television."

The comic point of the bit was that everyone says the words, but that we hypocritically pretend to find them offensive in the media. He was arrested for performing that routine in Milwaukee in 1972. A year later the routine was broadcast by radio station WBAI in New York, which was sanctioned by the FCC for broadcasting obscene language during daytime hours.

The case eventually worked its way to the U.S. Supreme Court, where the sanction was upheld in a 5-4 vote that has continued to guide broadcast obscenity and indecency policy through today.

Carlin said that ruling simply reinforced the original point of the routine - and his own frustration with America. He stopped voting after George McGovern was defeated by Richard Nixon in 1972, he said, calling elections "the illusion of choice."

The "Seven Dirty Words" case did reinforce his stature as a counterculture hero, though, and he was the first host of a new TV comedy show called "Saturday Night Live" in October 1975.

A year later he unexpectedly quit live performing. He returned five years later with the acclaimed album "A Place for My Stuff" and began a series of HBO specials he would continue until early this year. He also performed regularly in Las Vegas.

He took a number of TV and movie roles over the years, introducing himself to a new generation of fans with the "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure" series and an even newer generation with children's shows like "Thomas the Tank Engine."

He did voiceovers in films that included "Cars" and in 1993 he got his own sitcom on Fox, "The George Carlin Show." He played George O'Grady, a New York cab driver, and the show ran 27 episodes.

Carlin also wrote several best-selling books, including "Brain Droppings." Columnist Mike Barnic

PETALUMA, Calif. (AP) - Gus the dog has three legs, one eye and no hair, except for a white tuft on the top of his head. He's a real winner.

The pedigree Chinese crested won the World's Ugliest Dog contest on Saturday at the Sonoma-Marin Fair in Northern California.

His owner, Jeanenne Teed, brought Gus all the way from St. Petersburg, Fla., to compete for the dubious distinction

After the excitement of the moment, Teed characterized her dog's reaction: "Well, I think right now he's ready for a nap."

The Chinese crested breed is a popular choice in this annual contest. Last year's champ, Elwood, was a Chinese crested and Chihuahua mix.

Gus' owner won $500 and will be flown to New York to appear on "CBS This Morning." The event will be aired on the Animal Planet network in October.

___

TONY'S NEW BOOK, "A VOYAGE LONG AND STRANGE: REDISCOVERING THE NEW WORLD", IS A FUNNY, INVESTIGATIVE LOOK AT HOW AMERICA CAME TO BE, BEYOND COLUMBUS BRINGING THE PILGRIMS OVER TO GIVE INDIANS BEER AND VENEREAL DISEASE...OR WHATEVER HAPPENED.

THIS IS THE GUY THAT WROTE "CONFEDERATES IN THE ATTIC", THAT MANY OF YOU CIVIL WAR FANS/RE-ENACTORS READ. HE'S ON TUESDAY MORNING.

The New York Times Book Review
"Funny and lively. . . Popular history of the most accessible sort.... The stories Horwitz tells are full of vivid characters and wild detaiL.

WEDNESDAY...BODY SHOPPING: THE ECONOMY FUELED BY FLESH AND BLOOD

GOT SOME OVARIES OR A KIDNEY YOU DON'T NEED?  A FASCINATING LOOK INSIDE THE MEDICAL WORLD OF SELLING BODY PARTS. HOW MUCH WILL THAT SIXTH TOE GO FOR? WE'LL ASK DONNA DICKENSON ON WEDNESDAY....

AND, WE'LL SEE HOW THE CITY COUNCIL VOTE ON POLICE RESIDENCY WENT.

 LONG TIME HOST OF NBC'S "MEET THE PRESS" AND VETERAN JOURNALIST TIM RUSSERT GONE AT 58.

A GOOD AND DECENT MAN WHO ADORED HIS DAD, BIG RUSS, AND WROTE A BEST-SELLING BOOK ABOUT HIM.....DEVOTED TO  HIS SON WHO GRADUATED FROM BOSTON COLLEGE LAST WEEK, LOVED THE BUFFALO BILLS AND LOVED THE POLITICS OF AMERICA.

GIVE YOUR POP AN EXTRA HUG THIS SUNDAY AND LIKE WARREN ZEVON SAID, "ENJOY EVERY SANDWICH".

PS: AND BILL O'REILLY IS STILL WALKING AROUND SOMEWHERE BEING A CHOAD. OH, THE HUMANITY.

Illustration by Victor Juhasz

From Publishers Weekly
Sportswriter, screenwriter and author Deford (Alex: The Life of a Child; Everybody's All-American) scores another hit with this novel of athletes behaving badly. After a career spent knocking around in the minor leagues as a player and manager, Howie Traveler has finally made it to the majors as manager of the Cleveland Indians. The team, however, is struggling, and Howie's job is in jeopardy when the team's star player, Jay Alcazar, is accused of rape. Though Howie's playing career stalled out in Triple A, his big league management career depends on how well he can handle Alcazar, heralded as "the best player in the game." Alcazar insists he's innocent—perhaps even believes it—but Howie suspects otherwise, having witnessed a troubling scene involving accused and accuser the night of the alleged rape. Now, Howie has to choose between his conscience and his dream job. The resolution won't please everyone, but Deford tackles timely and provocative issues without flinching. (May)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Book Description
Outspoken, no-nonsense, and eminently fascinating, Joseph M. Arpaio captured the public's imagination from his first day as sheriff of Maricopa County, Arizona, in 1992. He has become an icon, not only in his own state, but all over the world. For 15 years, he has maintained an unprecedented 80% approval rating. Famous for his "get smart and get tough" approach to jails, "Sheriff Joe," as he is universally known, conceived The Tent City Jail where he houses his inmates in surplus army tents left over from the Korean War. Known as the "Alcatraz of Arizona," the jail features chain gangs and stringent discipline. By eliminating all comforts for his inmates, he has managed to shave $500,000 annually from the cost of keeping prisoners. But he also offers a wide range of educa­tional and therapeutic courses for inmates. To his ardent followers, he is a hero for both his toughness on crime and his sense of humanity. While his opponents decry him for his iron-fisted approach, no one can deny that Sheriff Joe is one of the country's most respected elected officials. Joe's Law is an uncensored look by "America's Toughest Sheriff" at some of the most important and difficult issues facing America today. As the first law enforcement official in the country to arrest illegal immigrants, Arpaio tackles illegal immigration head on--how it intertwines with drug traffick­ing, taxes, and crime, and how it impacts health care and education as well. Arpaio offers innovative and fair ways to solve this dilemma and many others, not only in his own state but throughout the country.Compelling and courageous, this is a candid take on some of America's most pressing social prob­lems, and one man's revolutionary vision for eliminating them.

WE'RE TRYING TO GATHER EMAIL ADDRESSES OF Y'ALL LOYAL (?) LISTENERS SO WHEN IMPORTANT SHIT COMES UP, YOU'LL BE THE FIRST TO KNOW.

EASY, SIMPLE, FREE, NO OBLIGATION, AIN'T GONNA SELL IT TO A PORN SITE.  UNLESS THEY OFFER A LOT OF MONEY.

CLICK THE FRONT PAGE ICON OR SEND IT TO

CLUB@DRAKEZEKE.COM  LOVE YA, MEAN IT.

LOS ANGELES, California -- Comic actor Harvey Korman has died at 81, according to the UCLA Medical Center.

Harvey Korman's death comes after complications from the rupture of an abdominal aortic aneurysm.

Korman died at the center four months after suffering complications from the rupture of an abdominal aortic aneurysm.

"It was a miracle in itself that he survived the incident at all. Everyone in the hospital referred to him as 'miracle man' because of his strong will and ability to bounce right back after several major operations," said Korman's daughter, Kate Korman. "Tragically, after such a hard-fought battle, he passed away."

Korman was a regular on "The Carol Burnett Show" from 1967 through 1978, for which he won Emmy awards in 1969, 1971, 1972 and 1974. He also won a Golden Globe for his work on the series.

The lanky Korman also appeared in Mel Brooks' "Blazing Saddles" (as the sneering Hedley Lamarr), "High Anxiety" and "History of the World, Part 1."

He starred in his own short-lived situation comedy, "The Harvey Korman Show," in 1978, in which he portrayed Harvey Kavanaugh opposite Christine Lahti, who played his wife, Maggie.

He made dozens of appearances in other television shows and movies during his lengthy show-business career, including providing voices for several animated productions. Among those was The Great Gazoo, a helmeted space man who appeared in some episodes of "The Flintstones."

Angie Horejsi, an assistant to Burnett, told The Associated Press that Burnett was devastated by Korman's death: "She loved Harvey very much," Horejsi said.

The AP also reported that Brooks described Korman as a "dazzling" comic talent.

"You could get rock-solid comedy out of him. He could lift the material. He always made it real, always made it work, always believed in characters he was doing," he said, according to AP.

Korman was born in Chicago, Illinois. His first marriage, to Donna Ehlert in 1960, ended in divorce in 1974. He married Deborah Fritze in 1982. Both marriages produced two children.

Korman landed some sketch work on "The

GREAT PIC FROM PEREZHILTON.COM OF RON JEREMY ON SET WITH 'HEROES' STAR ALI LARTER...WTF??

NICE PECKER DAWG! PITCHY...CLICK THE LINK ABOVE.

..THE DIRTY LIFE AND TIMES OF WARREN ZEVON ....

THURSDAY, WE'LL TALK WITH CRYSTAL ZEVON ABOUT THE REMARKABLE ORAL BIO OF HER FORMER HUSBAND.

AND, PAULINE FROMMER, THE TRAVEL LADY, ABOUT BUDGET TRAVEL FOR SUMMER.

THIS IS NOT A PICTURE OF POLICE DIRECTOR LARRY GODWIN...BUT, HE'LL JOIN US WEDNESDAY ALONG WITH OUR FRIEND AILENE HOOPER FROM PROJECT PACKAGE, TO TELL HOW WE CAN HELP THE TROOPS AS MEMORIAL DAY APPROACHES.

TOMORROW, MARK VONNEGUT ON "ARMAGEDDON IN RETROSPECT"....HIS DAD, KURT VONNEGUT'S NEW BOOK OF ESSAYS ON WAR AND PEACE.

AND GARDENING GURU P. ALLEN SMITH.......EMAIL QUESTIONS FOR ALLEN OR MARK TO MAIL@DRAKEZEKE.COM

THE HILLSTRAND BROTHERS NEW BOOK, "TIME BANDIT" IS  OUT AND ANDY WILL TALK CRAB FISHING ON MONDAY MORNING...

IN RED WING, MINNESOTA. NICE PLUMAGE, HOLMES.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-aGTNS13SDU

ONE REVIEWER SAYS:

I have read or gone through at least 500 health books written in the last 5 years. This is simply one of the best and clearly written ones I have come across. I'd never heard of Asa before and I saw this book in the library, so I checked it out. I was just expecting the same rehash of health information that's generally out there with probably an emphasis on something or other that would distinguish this book and the author. Boy, was I surprised. After years of reading about health and applying what I thought useful to my own diet and routine, I finished this book knowing at least 30% more than I had known. In other words, I changed 30% of what I was doing. And it was easy. Rarely has a book made such a difference to my routine. Most of what he suggests makes total sense to me and and is explained quite clearly. I found out he has a radio show available on itunes and have been listening ever since. Asa is a gifted writer and speaker. I can't recommend this book enough, and I can't wait for his next one.

CLICK THE RED LINK TO READ HAMPTON'S NEW PIECE IN THE APRIL EDITION OF MEMPHIS MAGAZINE.

HE'S IN TOWN COMPLETING RESEARCH ON HIS NEW BOOK ON JAMES EARL RAY AND THE 40TH ANNIVERSARY OF MEMPHIS, APRIL 4, 1968.

HE'LL BE IN STUDIO FRIDAY MORNING AT 7:30.

'MY NAME IS EARL' RETURNS TO NBC THURSDAY WITH AN HOUR SPECIAL. WE'LL TALK TO JAIME PRESSLY ABOUT THE SHOW......

ALSO, RICHARD FLORIDA'S NEW BOOK, 'WHO'S YOUR CITY' WHICH EXPLAINS WHY WHERE YOU LIVE IS IMPORTANT TO YOUR JOB AND PERSONAL GROWTH IN GENERAL. WE'LL SEE WHERE MEMPHIS RATES.

Krishi Dutt, a huge Ricky Martin fan from Mumbai, was in Kolkata for official purposes and couldn't have asked for a better "surprise."

The lucky Krishi was able to share a sauna bath with Ricky at the Grand Oberoi hotel in Kolkata. Nude.

Krishi said Ricky was sporting a moustache and beard. When asked if he was the singer, Rick smiled and said, "you have the wrong person".

Bitch, please.

What he wanted to say was, "Get down on all knees and start sucking!"

Krishi also noticed Ricky had a large tattoo on his left arm and one on his lower pelvic area. He was wearing a beaded anklet and had henna on his feet.

After about 30 minutes or so in the sauna, Ricky left to then return and ask for some help finding his locker room keys.

He was trying to give him signals! Enriquetta was in heat!

After Martin got dressed and was about to leave, Krishi ran up to him and asked for an autograph. This time Ricky smiled, gave the autograph and left.

Turns out the singer was in Kolkata to visit the Sabera Foundation, a non-profit organization which helps homeless children, as well as widows and women who have been abandoned by their husbands. The foundation was founded by Spanish singer,Nacho Cano.

We still can't get over Ricky naked in the steam room!

That's so George Michael of him!